A
greenhorn of a lieutenant, who had recently been entered for provisions on
board the Royal William, as
supernumerary waiting for a passage to the West Indies, at one p.m.
disagreeably surprised Billy in his usual avocation of basting a fine
goose. As the day was warm, Billy sat
without his coat, his shirt-sleeves tucked up, and an over-sized ladle in his
hands.
'Mr.
Culver, I presume?' said Greenhorn.
'I am
called Billy Culver,' said our friend, removing the little three-cornered hat
from his capacious cocoa-nut.
'I am
extremely sorry to announce to you, Mr. Culver'
'Billy,
if you please, sir.'
'Well,
then, if it will soften the unpleasant information, Mr. William Culver'-
'I
answer to no other name but Billy Culver,' replied our old friend;' but I see
you are heated, sir; try a swig out of my rummer' and he presented his large
glass, with the reddish liquor, to the young officer, who thankfully drank till
Billy called 'Belay there'; and the officer, after drawing breath, in a
courteous manner said —
'It is
my unpleasant duty to arrest you, as absent without leave, and convey you, as a
prisoner, on board the Royal William guardship.'
'This is
very mal à propos, as I was to dine
with some friends on the fine bird before you; but I will put on my coat and
attend you to old Grimsby, who is very harsh, as I am only a few days over my
leave of absence granted by him. May I
beg the favour of you not to let it burn till I can send the cook in?' So
saying, Billy slipped on his coat, and slipped out of the back-door, and very
soon reported himself as come on board, to first Lieutenant Grimsby.
'Mr. Culver, you have overstayed your time three
days, and I have sent Lieutenant Greenhorn to bring you off under an arrest. Have you
seen him?'
'Dear
me, how strange!' said Billy, endeavouring to look very innocent; 'after taking
our nooner together (by this he meant a glass of grog, a bad custom in vogue
among seamen, even in these days of refinement and reform), I left him in full
uniform, basting a goose roasting by the kitchen fire of the India Arms,
Gosport; and if you'll please to allow me to fulfil an indispensable
engagement this day, I will, on my
passage, make known to him your commands.'
'Send
him off instantly, sir; such conduct is particularly unbecoming in an officer
or a gentleman.'
And our
acquaintance, Lieutenant Greenhorn, was ever after facetiously termed Goose
Gibbey. I believe Billy's objections to
being the youngest lieutenant were in course of time conquered, and that he
died in a rank I never expect to obtain, that of post-captain.
